Battambang

Hey all,

So much has happened since my last post in Chiang Mai but I'll try to cover the main highlights. A few days after my birthday the most tragic event in my life took place. Someone who I've considered one of my best friends since my first soccer team when I was 4 was taken so unexpectedly and so soon. I was in complete denial until the funeral a week and a half later. Natasia and I have almost too many memories together. She was there for my first kiss, my first time accepting Christ, my first 'feminine experience'haha, my first Disneyland experience, lake trips, soccer teams, church camps/youth group, and so many more. We've watched eachother grow up and held eachother's hands through it all. She never forgot one of my birthdays in 19 years and gave me a present every Christmas even up until this past Christmas before I left for Australia. She knew me and loved me from the inside out and I so looked forward to coming home and sharing everything with her. But God is sovereign and He decided to take that beautiful girl to be with Him where she won't know what pain feels like. It's hard for me to even write this because I already miss her so much. I found out when I was in Thailand and 3 days later God provided a way for me to come home for her funeral and then fly all the way back to Cambodia. He is so good and I'm amazed how the people around me flocked in support and love, knowing my suffering. He used these people to get me home because thats where He wanted me and I will be forever grateful for their quick obedience. Being home for those 5 days was such a time of refreshment and healing for me. Christian drove all the way up from El Salvador just to be with me for those 5 quick days. That meant so much to me :) and my amazing family and friends were with me every step of the way. It was sooo good to just relax on the couch with them or go to Alena's for dinner with everyone. My heart goes out to the Lukiewski family!! I think about them and Tash every day and have been passionately praying for them.

Battambang, Cambodia- my current living place. Can you say culture shock?? Wow. From the dirt-paved roads, to the emaciated cows on the roads, to the 100 degree weather, to the interesting food, to the predominantly Buddhist culture, it has been quite a change from even Thailand. Cambodia is a dirty place with little hope. We've been working in 2 orphanages and teaching English/Bible at the local private Christian school. My favorite part of the day is always when we drive away from the nightime orphanage on our tuk tuk as they all stand outside and wave until they cant see us anymore. It helps me realize how much of an impact we're making with them. I'm falling in love with some of the kids! I want to take them home with me! Most of those kids know the Lord which is awesome. When Cambodians become Christians, they aren't just disliked like we are, they are shunned from their families, denied education and shelter. They are literally left with nothing. So I praise God for every single one that chooses to follow Him! We leave here in 3 days to drive back to Bangkok where Bry and Tiff surprised us with a resort for 3 nights!! Cant wait! Then one week in Australia and this YWAM journey ends. Madness!

Hill tribes, Tigers, Prostitutes, & World's biggest water fight

Today marked the 2nd day of SongKran- the Thai new year which is celebrated by "blessing" others with water on their heads. We put together candy packages with a card claiming God's love & plans for each of us and have been handing them out as we drench random people with water. I think it's maybe the best holiday ever created. We've been in Chiang Mai for a week now living at the guest house of "Lighthouse in Action" ministry (www.lighthethai.com). This ministry is devoted to reaching the rejected and outcast of Chiang Mai who work in the local bars as prostitutes. One bar we've been going to every night is a "ladyboy" bar filled with transvestites. Personally I've felt God pulling me toward the prostitute bar right next door and the gay bars down the street. I've formed friendships with some of the girls and guys, just trying to pour God's love into them as best I can. There have been several challenges for me the past week or so with the language barrier and just the relationship-building type of ministry this is. You don't get to see the fruits of God's work right away like our time spent in the hill tribes our first week. SongKran is a huge deal in Thailand so you can imagine the amounts of alcohol and parties happening all over the place. Today we camped out right across from this major bar next to the mote that surrounds the main part of the city. It just so happened that the ladyboys, prostitutes, and the like were all camped out next to us and across from us. I acquired a squirt gun some how and was happily shooting everyone in sight. Then I saw Gaw and Lek (2 girls from the bar I've been going to) who rushed over to me with big hugs and even a kiss. I was so happy to see them but they tried desperately to shove alcohol down my throat. It was tough for me to see the emptiness in their eyes and it was then that I got a glimpse of God's heart for them. I lovingly scurried my way out of their grip and dumped water on their heads. Other than that and the broken beer bottle I stepped on, the day was solid. Mallory has really gotten close with a ladyboy named Rose who is starting to trust her and Bryan has been building a friendship with a ladyboy named Marina who basically owns the whole bar scene in Chiang Mai. If God can soften her heart and bring her to know Him, this whole prostitue/ladyboy industry would take a dramatic, awesome turn. I genuinely love these girls and want them to know what true peace feels like.

Last week we were in a remote hill tribe Qurin village 6 hours up a windy, unpaved mountain. A man named Joe took us on this little adventure as our translator and project-planner. He is such a godly man!! I respect him so much for the humble work he's doing in those villages. Basically what we did all week was live with the pastor's family in their bamboo hut fully equipped with squatty potties, firewood, and running water. What a culture shock! I learned so much from these Burmese people. During the day we went down into the jungle one by one carrying back big, long pieces of wood for a few miles until we reached the platform where Joe & the pastor will build a hostel for the children to be educated, fed, sheltered, and taught about who Jesus is. We did this for 4 days and the weather was nice and toasty. At night we hung out with the village kids, sang songs, and played games. I loved Bet Na, the pastor's wife, because every time I tried to talk to her she would just die laughing. I love her laugh! I feel so stupid sometimes trying to speak their language, but I'll give them a laugh if they want it. The lifestyle in the hill tribes was so opposite to my own. Even though this remote, impoverished, native village is located in a Buddhist area where other religions are unwanted, God is at work there. I think that is rad! God has anointed people to be His working hands everywhere because He wants everyone to know him.

Yesterday was my big 23rd birthday!! My team spoiled me rotten with gifts and letters all day long. Mal and Josie bought me my favorite 2 dresses I saw in the markets, Tiff made me pancakes in the morning and then surprised me with a fish spa treatment to clean my dirty feet, the boys wrote me bday notes, and we all went out to a nice dinner. At the fish spa you stick your feet into a tank of water as baby fishies suckle all of the bacteria and dead skin off. It was pretty much a big team joke because I had the most embarrassing spill the other day into the sewage hole next to our house. My leg was pouring blood from scratching the side of the cement hole, but the most repulsive part that I was more concerned about was the fact that my foot was drenched in hunan feces. It's hard for me to even type this out because it brings back all of those disgusting feelings and shivers but I had to share that little golden nugget with everyone. So that is why Tiff and Bry bought me a fish foot spa treatment for my feet. My team absolutely loved that incident with all of their hearts.

I forgot to mention that on Sunday, which is our day off every week, we went to Tiger Kingdom! At tiger kingdom you can either play with the big tigers, the medium tigers, or the baby tigers. I chose the medium tigers because they were playful but not too ferocious for me. Tigers are my favorite animal so I was ecstatic all day! We took loads of pictures and I tried to get as close as I possibly could to their gorgeous faces but the workers kept batting me away. That was definitely a highlight for me.

On another note, I miss home and cant wait to see everyone!! My birthday was awesome, but I really truly missed being with my family and friends from home like all my other birthdays.

In His Grip,
Caitlyn

Bangkok & Bumble Bees

So we're on a scavenger hunt all over Bangkok right now and one of our stops on the list is to go to this internet/coffee cafe called "Bloom" to write a quick note to someone back home. I chose the blog cuz it reaches everyone! Obviously we got here safely from Brisbane. We got off the plane, hopped on a "song taw" (which is a truck that has benches and an overhang in the back with poles to hold on to) and arrived at YWAM thailand-bankok. Relaxed a bit before we strolled into the marketplace where we danced & ate fried bugs. Not kidding. I ate a bee. Almost threw up but I did it. The guys ate handfulls of grasshoppers, maggots, thick fat worms, and who knows what else!! This culture is so different so we had orientation this morning led by a man named Paw whose role is to introduce the foreigners to Thai culture. Thailand is amazingly inexpensive and hot. I'm obsessed with Thai food. They LOVE fair skin and greet eachother with a "sawatdee-ka" hands together and a head bow. Only 1 % of the entire population declares themselves Christians, while 94% are Buddhist. God's work through different YWAM ministries is clear and I couldn't be more excited right now for the next 2 months!! We have a temple tour tomorrow in Bangkok and then a 13 hour bus ride north to Chiang Mai. I already have so many stories to tell but this will have to do for now because we have to continue our scavenger hunt.
Thanks for your prayers. Also, pray for healing for Tiffany's cold and Bryan's hip :) love you all!

A New Chapter

It's Sunday morning and the house is quiet. Everyone left last night except for the Thaibodia and Bali/Philippines teams. Lecture phase is over. The good news is that we'll all be seeing eachother again in 2 months because we're all flying back here to Sunny Coast for debrief week on May 23rd. Actually we're all on the same connecting flight from Malaysia to head back here which is going to be unreal! It was surprisingly really sad to see them go. I thought I would be totally fine since I've been preparing for this day for 3 months, but I already miss a few of them. No tears from me though because I for some reason rarely cry which I'm realizing more and more since I've been in Australia. This sharp pain hits my chest but the tears only come on occasion... it's weird and I don't like it!
On another note, this past week was kind of a blur for me. Trying to soak in every minute together before departure and at the same time attempting to pack up our lives here for another adventure posed quite a hectic 5 days. God blessed us with a gorgeous few days so in the midst of all the chaos, we escaped to the beach a few times to soak in the rays. I know my skin damage-conscious sister LOVES that! The speaker for the week was a pastor from Byron Bay named Neville. I'm not being dramatic- he is the most knowledgable person I've ever come across in my Christian life. When it comes to apologetics, I've never met someone better either. That said, I got lost a few times during lecture but on the whole he taught me so much more than I expected for my last week. The topic was missions and the key to missions is worship. Neville pounded this in our heads and hearts. In order to be a tool for God to be excited to use, God wants to know that I'm going to give Him every ounce of the glory and not take any for myself. This is why he loves to use the weak. The weak have been brought out of their weakness only by he power of God and they know it. For me personally, I struggle with pride and the notion that I can do and get anything I want if I put my whole mind, heart, and body into it. I don't know if that is just a super competitive, athlete thing that has been driven into me my whole life or if it comes from the pressures within the American society or if it is something else, but whatever the case, this whole idea of weakness does not come naturally for me. If God wants complete ownership of his glory then he's going to be more reluctant to use someone who secretly desires to be glorified.
The supernatural realm was a hot topic this week. With a pentecostal background, Neville has seen and experienced a dramatic desire for the Holy Spirit. Neville actually has a really cool testimony but I won't go there right now. He has a wealth of knowledge about supernatural things. Healings, visions, dreams, and things that can only be from God. We know that as we go out in His name it is very likely that some of these ways that God uses to speak to us will take place. I can't wait! Literally. I can't wait anymore here- I need to go to Thailand & Cambodia. I'm sick of hearing about all the tragedy out there and being stuck here. Tomorrow night! The first week in Thailand we'll be hiking up in the mountains on the border of Thailand and Burma, delivering medical supplies, blankets, water, and food to the poorest of the poor in the mountain villages. When I say medical supplies I mean things like band-aids and gauze pads to patch up infected mosquito bites and who knows what else. I'm really looking forward to each part we have planned for this outreach. The 2nd week we'll be working with orphans and sex slave ministries. The 3rd week we'll be in Phuket (look it up on Google, it's gorgeous) working with a kids' sports ministry. The 4th week we'll be back in Bangkok & I forget what we're doing there. Bry and Tiff said the best times are going to be the times that are completely unplanned where we're just praying for guidance and His leading to speak to certain people or go to certain places. I'm so excited for these times! Then we're off to Battambong, Cambodia where we'll be for the entire last month of outreach. I'm telling you all of this now because I don't know how often I'll be able to blog since internet access will be extremely limited.
I just want to say thank you to everyone who has been supporting me this entire 3 months. Thanks for following my journey and for every single prayer you've prayed for me. Each of us on team Thaibodia are trying to raise up as much of the body of Christ we belong to back home to pray for us because we know that prayer changes things. So please take some time to pray for: Bryan and Tiffany-their health, their marriage, and a sensitivity to the Holy Spirit
Our team- safety, direction, adaptability, and divine unity

I want to send a special thank you to you mom for being the first to introduce me to Jesus and for following Him faithfully even when you don't want to. You are such a role model to me and I miss you so much.
We leave tomorrow night at 7, flight is at 11 from Brisbane to Bangkok. I'm off to be a little bird on a mission! haha

Week 7: The Living Word

"I'd rather miss the will of God trying than do nothing at all."

It has been way too long since my last post, I'm sorry! Right now I'm in the midst of packing up and preparing for outreach since God was yet again faithful in providing all the needed finances! We leave for Bangkok on Monday so I will definitely post again later on this week and during outreach as well to keep you updated. Christian came to visit me all last week which was such a breath of fresh air for me and I was very sad to see him go this morning but God really used Christian to help renew my strength and bring me so much joy. Because Prayer Week was so heavy I found myself almost forcefully barricading my heart again as to avoid anymore intense and draining personal transformation. Though I was really excited to dive into the next week's curriculum, I put the breaks on in the self-analysis department of my life.

The week after Prayer Week we studied the Living Word (fancy phrase for Bible) taught by my outreach leader, Bryan Hunsberger. Bryan knows more about the Bible than anyone I know and he is only 23. I had a good chunk of questions about the Bible that I never really voiced before because I think I felt like I should have already known all the answers or maybe I was just too embarrassed to ask them for some stupid, prideful reason. Most of my questions were answered this week, but one important thing I learned was that as long as I am living here on this Earth I will never know all the answers and neither will anyone else. What I know for sure is that Jesus is truth and the Bible is just further proof. If you ask for a passion for God's Word He will give it to you. But it's important to be persistent and to ask with a whole heart. We learned that sadly only 60% of believers in America believe the Bible is totally accurate. I dont know about you but that statistic really rocked my world. How can we call ourselves Christians and not trust in the Bible? I will be the first to admit that I have had my doubts about the Bible and it's ability to last thousands of years- especially after 4 years at an ultra-liberal, skeptic, anti-Christian University. But that is why I'm here. I'm seeking God's face with my whole life because I want to know Him. I've been asking God to build my faith and this week He showed me that I can trust Him and His Word. All of my doubts have been shattered because God graciously removed them for me over time as I seek Him relentlessly.

The Bible has been preserved miraculously for thousands of years. It is timeless in the fact that something that was written so incredibly long ago still is applicable to my life today. Bryan took us through the Old Testament, the 10 Commandments, the New Testament, the 400 years of silence between the Old and the New Testament, and we finished with a Jesus story every day. We talked one day about the fruits of the Holy Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23): love, joy, patience, peace, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, self-control, and gentleness. Because we know Jesus, He has sent his Holy Spirit to counsel us through each and every day. Just because we may not feel Him emotionally does not mean He isn't there. He is here in fullness all the time no matter where we go and it takes true faith to actually believe and follow Him. I have seen with my own eyes the work of the Spirit and that is why many of my own doubts have been replaced with faith. We also broke down the 4 gospels: the audience, the writer, and the purpose. Acts, Philippians, James, John, Isaiah. The book Isaiah was written by the prophet Isaiah 650 years before Jesus was born. The probability that Jesus would fulfill all the prophecies that He did, would be like filling the state of Texas with quarters, standing waist deep in them, coloring one blue, and choosing that one quarter!!

God really took this week and used it to expand my knowledge. Even though I didn't apply what I learned to my life right away, I learned so much that I will carry with me forever. Toward the end of the week I was ready to take that barricade back down from around my heart to let God continue his work. "Problems are opportunities for God to work." -Bryan Hunsberger. Problems can either be whined about or they can be a perfect circumstance for God to show Himself. Just depends how you look at it. Anyway, I have to get to bed but I'll be back in a flash this week when I find some time. Thanks for your prayers and all your support back home. I miss home! Bye for now :)

Week 6: Prayer Week

So we're now in week 7 but let me reflect a bit on prayer week last week. Its amazing what happens when you actually chase after God full force. We had groups of people praying every hour of the day, besides our little chunk of time for lecture with Leon, for 5 days straight. Our little prayer room became a popular place of escape. I remember thinking "I wish we always had this room" but then I realized I can dwell on God and talk to Him anytime I want in any place I want. Still, in our little sanctuary it was so much easier to focus on Him. Monday was a big day for me. Ever since Byron Bay I've been asking God to show me what is keeping Him from having my whole heart. The things in my life that I hold with a closed fist. Well Monday morning after base worship and tea time, God brought me to my knees in surrender. I was in the back of the room during our little worship/ open mic/ confession/ whatever-we-wanted-it-to-be time when I realized that God was asking me to lay down my family, Christian, and my guilt. I was holding myself up by a stack of chairs because I was too weak in the knees to hold myself up. I went for a walk outside for awhile just asking God why I have to give Him the most important things in the world to me (minus the guilt). My family is everything to me. I tear up just thinking about how much I love them and they love me. And Christian is my best friend who I love more than words can express. Questions flooded my mind. What does it mean to lay them down? Am I strong enough? Whats the point anyway? I didn't get any answers right away... not until Wednesday when I actually decided to speak this out to the rest of the school in front of everyone on the mic. Afterward everyone prayed for me and some approached me after with a few words that were directly from God confirming a few serious questions for me. That night was one that I will remember until I'm old and gray. This may sound creepy and weird to any non-believers and maybe even some believers reading this but God just totally showed up that night. He surpassed any expectation I had going into this. It is a very long story and I will share it with only a few people in my life, but He actually revealed to us who He is, and the very reality of Heaven, Hell, Jesus, the Father God, and the Holy Spirit. I am still trying to digest that night. It ended with the most authentic and amazing worship session I have ever had in my life because we were all in utter awe of the God that we serve. The God that we GET to praise. He is so very real and so very worthy!!!
Anyway, He answered some of my questions that night with, "I will never force you to do anything, but if you want to be my disciple I need to have your whole heart. You must love me first." So I think God just wants to know that I love Him first and that I am willing to go and do whatever He asks of me. That I have faith in Him and His plan for me in this short life. I'm scared because my flesh wants so badly to just live a simple, uncomplicated life with all the materials and security I need. Mine is just one story this past week. Each person in the DTS had some sort of break through last week. All of these people were headed in one direction but have chosen to grow with God which has completely altered plans they've mapped out for their lives. I love how God moves in a repentent room. He loves it.
After a long week, Saturday the girls at 77 (my house) made a big house breakfast and we all slept in till 11ish (since we barely slept all week). I made French toast :) Then I went to the beach and we had a big movie/game night. A few of us went to this place called Thai Seasons which has awesome, cheap Thai food. Then Starbucks. Liz and I watched A Walk to Remember.. I'd been craving it for awhile! And Sunday I slept in again, went to the beach with a girl from Orange County named Breezy, went to church and played cards till pretty late. I'm still loving it here and I'm getting sad I only have a month left in Australia! My dad informed me that I'll be home in 98 days haha.
Lots of Love!

With Opened Eyes

Well, after a spiritually, emotionally, and physically exhausting week in Byron I feel like I am finally rejuvenated and refreshed. We studied the fear of the Lord this past week under the teaching of Glen Vines.

My favorite couple verses of the week: Proverbs 31:30 "Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised."

Psalm 25:14 "The Lord confides in those who fear him; he makes his covenant known to them."

God is hungry for me and you. He wants to confide in us. For me I am taking everything that I am learning and trying to apply it to my life but most of what I've been learning is very challenging! I know how apathetic I can become when I'm home, but I never want to return to that spiritual deadness. That life is too easy. God has been confirming to me every day that He has called not only me but everyone who labels him/herself as a Christian to live a radical life. A life that people of the world see and don't understand. This life is not going to be easy, but so rewarding and fun!
On Friday the director of the base and his wife shared during our missional living portion of the morning. They created a clothing company called "Moselle Clothing Company" which works alongside the ministry "Destiny Rescue." Destiny Rescue is a ministry devoted to rescuing sex slaves out of the pit of Hell that they are drowning in. They place the victims in a recovery center where they just love on them, feed them, and give them hope in Christ. This is when Moselle comes in. Moselle then takes the freed sex slaves and employ them. The business is brand new so they only have a few full-time workers right now in Thailand. The girls were taught how to knit and sew the clothes together so that each cent Moselle makes can go directly to these former sex slaves. It's incredible! Moselle doesn't have any other employees. Just volunteers. So I encourage anyone who reads this to at the very least check out their website www.moselleclothing.com. Destiny Rescue has ministries in Mozambique, East Asia, and Eastern Europe. Each victim saved has made the decision to have a relationship with Christ! Over the past few years God has really given me a heart for victims of sex trafficking and I'm praying about whether or not He wants me to really dive in to the abolition full force. We'll see!

- 1 million CHILDREN are in the sex trafficking trade as young as 4 years old.
- 27 million slaves exist today.
- Today you can buy a child on the Thai-Burmese border for $5 AUD.
- The UN estimates that a child is bought or sold every minute.

Human slavery makes more money than Google, Nike, and Starbucks combined! I know this stuff is really hard to think about but I just pray that it will open your eyes to see outside of our little bubble that we live in. On a lighter note, we went to the Kondalilla Falls today where I cliff-jumped and played in a few waterfalls. It was amazing. Last night we joined the September school at the base because they had their graduation ceremony, but I left early to play in a little soccer game which was amazing. It's been way too long since my last soccer game! Throughout the week, in between lectures and meals, students go to McDonalds and Starbucks all the time; McDonalds because it's cheap and Starbucks because it's relaxing. It's funny to me how much people love McDonalds! Please pray for finances for me-that my outreach fees would be provided for. Also, for those who are enslaved to human trafficking and for the clients who continue to enslave them. Ask God to convict them and stir in their hearts. Pray for my Thailand/Cambodia outreach team-that God would prepare us for the journey that is about to change our lives and hopefully tons of other lives. Thanks for your prayers!!

Byron Bay: Healing

Sunday morning we drove 3 hours south to Byron Bay which is a famous backpacking location. People from all over the world travel here to see this gorgeous landscape. It's so lush and green everywhere... extending straight to the crisp,clear ocean with sandy beaches. B-E-A-utiful. We're here staying at the Byron Bay YWAM base for evangelism until Friday so it has been a great little change of pace. Probably about 15 of the girls are crammed in the spider-infested garage where we sleep in bunk beds. We have a white horse in our backyard and there are loads of cows in the frontyard... very strange beach town. And I keep waking up to dreams of spiders crawling all over me! haha i really dont like them. The other girls are in a YWAM house a little closer to the beach and the boys are sleeping on the floor in the church.

So tonight was kind of another ground-breaking night for me and unlike anything I've ever experienced before. My roommate Jocelyn from New Mexico has suffered from scoliosis for years. Her back is in constant pain from sunrise to sunset and her legs have been uneven for at least the past 2 years. Her left leg is more than 1 inch shorter than her right. Tonight, after evangelism in the most hippie town I've ever been to called Nimbin, we decided to collectively pray for Jocelyn. The Holy Spirit was completely consuming the entire room as we prayed for her healing. One leader said we should sit her in a chair and straighten her legs and thats when I saw just how much shorter her left leg was from her right... how she hides it from people I have no idea. Anyway, we continued to ask Jesus faithfully to heal Jocelyn and I watched Jesus lengthen her left leg before my own eyes. Seriously!!! Her legs are now the exact same length!! I don't even know what to say!! Why does it take something like that for our faith to be dramatically increased? He is a faithful healer and I now have NO doubt what-so-ever!! It has been such a heavy night and my heart is just softening by the minute. Just thought I'd share that with you guys. If you have just the faith of a mustard seed, you can move mountains. Jocelyn will never be the same and neither will any of us as her witnesses.

Hope all is well back home :) I'll be pretty out of the loop this week because we're so busy all day every day but I will try to post again when I get back to sunny coast.
I love you!!!!!!

In His Grip,
Caitlyn

Heaps of Growth

Hi!
So we have this unbelievable speaker this week discussing "Hearing God's Voice." His name is Boris Schabr. He's in his late 20's with a wife and 2 kids and he is not only hilarious, but he runs the skate ministry for YWAM Sunshine Coast and is one of the founders of this base. I could go on and on about why everyone loves him so much, but its what he's teaching us that is so incredibly challenging-so challenging that we find ourselves talking about it hours later! Merely by telling the story of how he trusted Jesus in the process of choosing his wife, I was flabbergasted just because we don't hear those kinds of stories everyday... at least not from Camarillo. Something I've realized is that when I pray, I don't allow God the time to speak to me. It has basically always been about me venting to God about whatever it is I want to vent about and then ending the conversation without alotting Him the time of day to respond to me. Also when I pray I usually am only willing to hear what I want to hear from Him, but He will either respond with "yes, no, or wait." I could write 20 pages about what I've learned in the past 2 days alone, but the underlying lesson is that we need to wrestle with God more rather than just letting life pass by. I have a few major decisions ahead of me so the ability to really truly decipher God's voice is something that I need to seek after. How to hear His voice and His will for me rather than my own or anyone else's.

I have been having some great quiet times with the Lord each day and right now I am reading the whole New Testament which is always an educating experience in itself. I feel like I can never read enough. For small groups which meet every Thursday night we're going through the book "Captivating" by Stasi Eldredge, but we've yet to actually discuss the book. We just end up sharing our hearts the entire time with eachother. My group leaders are Tiffany (a newlywed who is also my outreach leader) and Fleur (who is my one-on-one counselor).These girls are amazing and I know they will always be in my life. Also on the agenda for reading is the book, "Is that Really You, God?" by Loren Cunningham- the founder of Youth With a Mission. We have this book report due on Monday!

No weekend trip this weekend because we're taking a week-long trip to Byron Bay starting Sunday to learn about evangelism. The word evangelism has so many negative connotations that just freak me out. But I will get over that stigma and open my mind up to it because we don't reap the benefits of having a personal relationship with God just to keep it to ourselves. I believe that it is so important to strive for others to have that same relationship with Him. Anywho, it is bedtime over here in Maroochydore and I have a food coma due to this scrumptious chocolate cake Tiffany made from scratch so I'm going to bed. Oh yea, I forgot, every Thursday morning we have Outreach prep with our outreach teams and this morning Tiffany and Bryan (the newlyweds who are my outreach leaders) picked each of us up from our houses, piled us into one of our vans, and drove us to their cute little house for crepes and coffee. She's a domestic goddess!! Each team member had to research something different about Thailand and Cambodia; my topic was sex trade in Thailand, for example. I'm so heart broken for what is going on over there, but it is going to be so much fun. We prayed today about where to go in Southern Thailand and each unanimously got Phuket (Poo-ket lol) so that is where we'll be before we head to Cambodia. The pieces are all starting to fit together but we're still praying about which ministries to be involved with. On my team there is this English 20 yr old named Josh who LOVES soccer and he is really good. So Bryan and Tiff wanted to maybe get involved in a soccer ministry :) I'd love it. Lots to pray about and lots to be excited about.

In His Grip Alone,
Caitlyn

Hi and good morning

I had a great weekend. Saturday we took a trip to the Australia Zoo where I saw koala bears, a tiger show, a crocodile show led by Steve Irwin's wife and daughter, tazmanian devils, elephants, and many more. But my favorite part of the zoo was definitely spending time in "Roo Heaven" which was basically a giant playground for kangaroos and wallabies. I got to lay down and spoon with them! It was a great time but I quickly realized that I don't have the energy I once had as a kid- I was exhausted by 3 and fell asleep on the way home like a baby.

This week the subject we have been studying is "the father heart of God" and our speaker is Ray McConnell who has been a missionary with his wife in Thailand for the past 10 years. The first couple days were really insightful and base worship on monday is always an intimate time with God, but it wasn't until yesterday that I really began to glimpse God's father heart and just how much He loves each one of us! We read 1 John 4 and focused on verses 13-19. I've been a Christian for awhile now so I have a decent amount of head knowledge when it comes to my faith. Everything changes when you can begin to know the heart of God let me tell you! It doesnt matter how much I've heard about him-all He wants is a deep, intimate, personal relationship with me so that I can truly know him.

Anyway, Ray is awesome and yesterday he gave us a project which is due in an hour. We all pulled names from a bag and our job is to bless that person with some sort of gift. I wish I was more creative!! O well- a letter it shall be. Miss you all. got to run. I posted a couple pictures on the right side of the blog- I'm learning!

1 John 4:19

Theme song for this week: Kim Walker- "How He Loves Us"

I know where I'm going!

I'm off to Thailand and Cambodia!! woo woo. Exactly where I wanted to go... yes! Please keep our tiny team in your prayers :)

He's Got the Whole World in His Hands :)

The whole house is here! My house is filled with 11 beautiful girls who all have one reason for being here. We all want Jesus! These are my housemates of "77" who I feel like I've already known for years: Liz (Norway), Mallory (San Francisco), Josie (Canada), Jenna (Chicago), Joselyn (New Mexico), Roosa (Finland), Amy (Canada), Maria (Norway), Fleur (France), and Reba (Canada). It is so amazing to see people from across the world worshiping the one true God together! So much has happened in the past four days that I will not be able to fit in here, but today was just too incredible to omit from my blog.

It began with a quick jog to the beach at 6 this morning ( I know you all are in shock about that). I usually jog through the housing track, cross the street, and I am blessed to have one of the most beautiful views anyone can see with their own two eyes in a matter of 7 minutes. After my jog I had to hurry home, shower, get dressed, and hop in the van with the rest of the girls. We joined the rest of the school in worship and then Mallory Larsen, our school leader who is only 25, opened up a time of testimony. I have been going to church all my life but I've never experienced a testimony time like this. It was SO much more authentic and real and Christ-centered. The way that every guy and girl, student and staff was so honest and vulnerable was incredibly refreshing!! We're all just people who have real, true, daily struggles. But we KNOW that there is hope, joy, and freedom through Jesus Christ himself. Ok now I feel like I'm getting a little preach-y but oh my gosh I wish everyone could feel the presence of our faithful God that overflows from this body of people. I'm hardly even scraping the surface of what I experienced today! Tears were just pouring down my face as each person bravely approached the stage, took off the masks that they had been hiding under for far too long, and laid it all out on the table for all of us to see. They realized that it's okay to be broken. It's okay to have faults and deep struggles. Christians are not perfect. Jesus is.

After that they told us the 5 outreach locations!!! I was so excited! Drum roll please: India/Bangladesh, China, Thailand/Cambodia, India/Nepal, and Bali/Phillipines. They gave each of us a sheet of paper and we got to choose the top 3 places we'd like to go. The staff chooses who goes to each location and we find out tomorrow! We're going to break up into teams of about 5-7 with 2 staff members (one guy one girl) on each team. India/Bangladesh is a Muslim nation, India/Nepal is a Buddhist nation, China is communist/atheist, Thailand is a Buddhist nation, and Bali is a Hindu nation. We will pray about which types of ministries we'll be doing in each of these places, but we will most-likely be working in orphanages, the slums, ministering to prostitutes and sex slave victims, and just getting to know people from the cities who don't know what true love is. Cant wait to find out tomorrow!

After the outreach location uncovering I had lunch with a few girls who really could relate to my story so we talked for hours. Then I had lunch duty clean up and went to the beach with a few friends but I am deathly afraid of jellyfish so I hardly went in the water (Mallory got stung yesterday). I love the warm water and I just rented a surfboard with a couple other girls so I need to overcome my fear asap. The beach was then followed by dinner back at the base with everyone else and the day finally came to an emotional end with a "girls night" at the house. More tears. More brokenness. haha I love it but I hate it. God is "makin moves" in this place thats for sure.

Anyway, thats a taste of my time here so far and I will try to post pictures soon! We are pretty busy and the computers are always limited at the house so I rarely find the time to post, but I will do my best ok dad! I love you all and miss you all like crazzyyyy but just know that this is where I am supposed to be right now. Talk to you soon! Later on mates.

MAIDEN VOYAGE

Alright so I am gonna be pretty horrible at this whole blogging thing at first so work with me :) Last night was a very emotional one as my family dropped me off at LAX and Christian & I said our goodbyes from my house. With a heavy heart and heavy eyes, I finally arrived at the airport (plenty early thanks to mom & dad). My flight was delayed a few hours so God granted me a little more time to relax & chat over coffee with my incredible family. On the downside, I am in New Zealand right now obviously killing time because I missed my connecting flight to Brisbane. No worries though, sooner or later I will be settled into my quaint little home with strangers who probably think like me. 

The night before last, I dont think I have ever felt so loved. My closest friends and closest family friends showed up at the house to send requests/praises to God for my  trip. Thank you all so much- I dont deserve the unbelievable support you have continued to give me throughout my life. Thanks Heather & Bri for teaching my technologically-illiterate butt how to use a blog... such an easy way to keep you guys informed & equipped be prayer warriors :)